Sean Burnett Dugdale-Martin
History is made on the 28th September 2024 when a drag wedding descends on Old St. Pauls. Brought to us by Willy Smackntush in partnership with Kerryn Pollock at Heritage New Zealand, this gothic matrimony is part of their Rainbow List Project. It's the first event of its kind in the cathedral since it was built in 1866, so, yeah, it’s dawning on me as I enter that this is no regular drag show. Ushered into the ornate, dark wood central chamber, it’s clear that this is a significant event and no doubt highly charged for much of its audience. Regardless of this, the crowd is bubbly and happily mingling. Keen to reclaim a sacred space in the worship of something sexy and fun, we’re guided to our seats.
The show opens with an introduction from Pollock who explains the significance of the event before introducing our reverend, Smackntush. Smackntush’s entrance is a glorious slow pace from the back of the hall, down the middle aisle, and towards the stage. Back-lit by a spotlight, the rhinestones and sequins on their crimson gown shimmer as the crowd goes absolutely wild. While lip-syncing to Hozier’s Take Me To Church, Smackntush beckons the groom, Eddie D’amore, to strut down the aisle towards the altar. D’amore is very much giving Laszlo Cravensworth and the crowd keeps up their wild frenzy.
The Groom’s Party comprises Robin Yablind in a Jack Skellington half-face skull and monochrome one-piece fit, Homer Neurotic in a two-tone blue wig with two sets of horns who sets the scene as the sad boi of the group, and finally Braiden Butter, who you might know as Ginger Velour from cabaret acts. Butter (Karli Holdren) also choreographed this 110-minute drag ensemble. Kudos must be given to stage manager Em Darling, who co-produced the show with Smackntush, and to Sound Bitch, who makes a space not-quite-built for shows like this fully suitable with their expert lighting and sound work. Miss Leading is credited with doing all the wigs for the evening and not one strand falls out of place during the whole ceremony, which is impressive, as they’re moving HEAPS!
The bridesmaids are Slay West (who I know from the Tīwhas and when she runs karaoke at BATS), Faux Femm, and Myrtle Montgomery. Their group processional begins with The Dixie Cups’ Chapel Of Love and medleys into other, feel-good bops like Cyndi Lauper’s Girls Just Want To Have Fun. Next, is the bride's entrance… Vixen Temple. As we see her, a margarita saucer hits the ground and shatters. Temple, giving Amy Winehouse and Wednesday Addams realness, is an absolute scene stealer. White contact lenses and black lipstick, she embodies a gothic bride against D’amore’s larger-than-life dire-wolf-hunting aesthetic. Together, they’re a pair Tim Burton wishes he was a part of, and they’re making Old St. Paul blush.
During the 20-minute intermission, our ushers from the beginning, award-winning and Billy T nominated comedic duo Booth the Clown and Jak Darling, hold up a black sign with red sequins spelling out ‘INTERMISSION’ on one side and ‘CALL ME’ on the other. It doesn’t take long to know why these two are finding such success as a pair. Their sense of play is limitless as they bound around the stage, playing with the sign, each other, and punters trying to get a drink. Jack hikes up their dress and pretends they are naked behind the sign, gasping and guffawing as it slips and a little more leg gets shown. At this moment, a member of the Front of House staff rushes by me. A tattooed helper in a velvet blue gown, armed with a brush and shovel, is off to clear up broken glass.
Opening the second act, drag performer Luci McDougall embodies one of the Deadly Sins, Lust, bringing more than a little sex appeal to an already scandalous situation. They aren’t credited, which is a shame, but the surprise is worth it! The music for this medley is sultry and sombre, at points having all instrumentation wash away and letting the words ring around the room as we watch, wide-eyed and slack-jawed, at what could erupt into a drag threesome. Right after this, D’amore starts singing opera. Not lip-syncing, singing. Jaws stay slack as Turandot booms through the hall. Our groom gives everything they’ve got for their demonic bride.
The show is, unsurprisingly, absolutely excellent. The only downside is sight-lines. The building doesn’t have tiered-seating, which means most of us don't get to see much of the lower-half of people's costumes or performances given below the waist, such as when Flo Rida’s Low comes on: it gets a little lost behind the heads of those in front of me. Small transgressions, inherent to the space which they can’t do much about, in a historic and fun night.
We end with a sermon from our Reverend Smackntush about how queer love is the ultimate rebellion, a warning about how there are protestors outside so we’re recommended to leave in pairs, and an invitation to come and take photos with the cast as they all look so amazing. The final jig is to Lady GaGa’s Judas and as the cast dance, the audience rises. An easy ovation to stand with, these gays just made history.
WEDLOCK was only on for one night, but to learn more about the show and what it means, follow the link here.
The Groom’s Party comprises Robin Yablind in a Jack Skellington half-face skull and monochrome one-piece fit, Homer Neurotic in a two-tone blue wig with two sets of horns who sets the scene as the sad boi of the group, and finally Braiden Butter, who you might know as Ginger Velour from cabaret acts. Butter (Karli Holdren) also choreographed this 110-minute drag ensemble. Kudos must be given to stage manager Em Darling, who co-produced the show with Smackntush, and to Sound Bitch, who makes a space not-quite-built for shows like this fully suitable with their expert lighting and sound work. Miss Leading is credited with doing all the wigs for the evening and not one strand falls out of place during the whole ceremony, which is impressive, as they’re moving HEAPS!
The bridesmaids are Slay West (who I know from the Tīwhas and when she runs karaoke at BATS), Faux Femm, and Myrtle Montgomery. Their group processional begins with The Dixie Cups’ Chapel Of Love and medleys into other, feel-good bops like Cyndi Lauper’s Girls Just Want To Have Fun. Next, is the bride's entrance… Vixen Temple. As we see her, a margarita saucer hits the ground and shatters. Temple, giving Amy Winehouse and Wednesday Addams realness, is an absolute scene stealer. White contact lenses and black lipstick, she embodies a gothic bride against D’amore’s larger-than-life dire-wolf-hunting aesthetic. Together, they’re a pair Tim Burton wishes he was a part of, and they’re making Old St. Paul blush.
During the 20-minute intermission, our ushers from the beginning, award-winning and Billy T nominated comedic duo Booth the Clown and Jak Darling, hold up a black sign with red sequins spelling out ‘INTERMISSION’ on one side and ‘CALL ME’ on the other. It doesn’t take long to know why these two are finding such success as a pair. Their sense of play is limitless as they bound around the stage, playing with the sign, each other, and punters trying to get a drink. Jack hikes up their dress and pretends they are naked behind the sign, gasping and guffawing as it slips and a little more leg gets shown. At this moment, a member of the Front of House staff rushes by me. A tattooed helper in a velvet blue gown, armed with a brush and shovel, is off to clear up broken glass.
Opening the second act, drag performer Luci McDougall embodies one of the Deadly Sins, Lust, bringing more than a little sex appeal to an already scandalous situation. They aren’t credited, which is a shame, but the surprise is worth it! The music for this medley is sultry and sombre, at points having all instrumentation wash away and letting the words ring around the room as we watch, wide-eyed and slack-jawed, at what could erupt into a drag threesome. Right after this, D’amore starts singing opera. Not lip-syncing, singing. Jaws stay slack as Turandot booms through the hall. Our groom gives everything they’ve got for their demonic bride.
The show is, unsurprisingly, absolutely excellent. The only downside is sight-lines. The building doesn’t have tiered-seating, which means most of us don't get to see much of the lower-half of people's costumes or performances given below the waist, such as when Flo Rida’s Low comes on: it gets a little lost behind the heads of those in front of me. Small transgressions, inherent to the space which they can’t do much about, in a historic and fun night.
We end with a sermon from our Reverend Smackntush about how queer love is the ultimate rebellion, a warning about how there are protestors outside so we’re recommended to leave in pairs, and an invitation to come and take photos with the cast as they all look so amazing. The final jig is to Lady GaGa’s Judas and as the cast dance, the audience rises. An easy ovation to stand with, these gays just made history.
WEDLOCK was only on for one night, but to learn more about the show and what it means, follow the link here.